The Best Practical Tips for Islamic Positive Parenting

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What is Positive Parenting in Islam?


When it comes to parenting in Islam, there are so many books, lectures, and videos readily available for parents to consume. Sometimes it is hard to think how we can take the advice and implement it in our own lives. Having consumed lots of such content myself, and through delivering my parenting workshops, some common themes have become evident. These are vital strategies we can implement as parents and guardians for the betterment of our children. To make it easier for you, I have compiled the top most important practical tips for parents below. 

1. Lead by Example

Leading by example means embodying the values and principles you want your children to follow. Whether it's honesty, kindness, patience, or humility, demonstrate these qualities in your daily interactions with family members, neighbours, and strangers. Children are highly observant, and they often emulate the behaviors they see in their parents. Arguably, this is probably the easiest strategy to implement, since it merely means whatever you would like to see your children do, do it yourself first. Oftentimes parents may want to see a certain characteristic in their children which is not reflected in their behaviour first. 

2. Teach Islamic Values

Set aside time to discuss and explain Islamic values to your children. Use stories from the Quran and Hadith to illustrate these values in action. For instance, you can narrate the story of Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) demonstrating kindness to animals or the importance of honesty as exemplified by Prophet Yusuf (Joseph). Make these teachings relatable and applicable to everyday life situations. There are many ways to teach these in a fun and age-appropriate way. When we taught Prophet stories, I used to run a Sunday craft club where we would listen to the story and then make a piece of artwork reflective of that story. 

3. Prayer and Worship

Involve your children in the 5 daily prayers. Explain the significance of each prayer and its role in strengthening one's connection with Allah. Encourage your children to participate actively in prayers, and make it a family practice to perform congregational prayers whenever possible. Even younger children can watch you pray and stand or sit next to you. 

Also read: 5 Powerful Duas for Exam Success

4. Islamic Education

Prioritize your children's Islamic education by enrolling them in Quranic classes or Islamic schools. Supplement their formal education with regular discussions about Islamic history, ethics, and spirituality. Encourage them to ask questions and explore their faith through reading and reflection. Remember education begins at home first. 

5. Effective Communication

Create a supportive environment where your children feel comfortable expressing their thoughts and emotions. Practice active listening and empathize with their concerns. Use age-appropriate language to convey Islamic concepts and address any questions or misconceptions they may have about their faith.

6. Respect and Discipline

Teach your children the importance of respecting elders, peers, and the diversity of people around them. Model respectful behavior in your interactions with others, and address any instances of disrespect or disobedience with firm yet compassionate discipline. Discipline should aim to correct behavior rather than instill fear or shame.

7. Family Time

Dedicate regular family time to engage in Islamic activities and strengthen bonds. This can include reading the Quran together, discussing Islamic teachings, or participating in communal acts of worship such as attending Friday prayers or performing Hajj simulations at home. Family time reinforces the importance of shared values and fosters a sense of unity and belonging.

8. Community Involvement

Encourage your children to actively participate in the Muslim community by attending mosque events, volunteering for charitable causes, and building relationships with fellow Muslims. Community involvement instills a sense of belonging and responsibility towards the broader Muslim ummah (community) while providing opportunities for spiritual growth and social development.

9. Duaa (Supplication)

Teach your children the power of dua and encourage them to develop a personal connection with Allah through supplication. Encourage them to express their desires, fears, and gratitude in their prayers, fostering a sense of trust and reliance on Allah's guidance and mercy. There are so many small yet meaningful duas children can learn even from a young age, e.g. the duas for waking, sleeping, and eating. 

10. Gratitude and Contentment

Cultivate an attitude of gratitude and contentment within your family by regularly expressing appreciation for Allah's blessings. Encourage your children to count their blessings and reflect on the abundance of gifts, both big and small, in their lives. Teach them to find contentment in simplicity and to avoid comparing themselves to others.

11. Islamic Etiquette

Teach your children the etiquette prescribed by Islam in various social interactions. This includes greeting others with salaam (peace), using polite language, showing kindness to neighbors and strangers, and observing modesty in dress and behavior. Emphasize the importance of humility and discourage arrogance or boastfulness.

12. Media and Technology Monitoring

Monitor the media and technology consumption of your children to ensure it aligns with Islamic values and principles. Set guidelines and restrictions on the content they can access, including websites, apps, and television programs. Use parental controls and engage in open discussions about the potential impact of media on their faith and behaviour. Regularly be up to date with apps/sites they may be accessing and ensure they are aware of internet safety. Make sure they know to tell you if they see anything that disturbs them online. 

By incorporating these expanded strategies into your parenting approach, you can nurture a strong Islamic identity in your children while fostering their spiritual, moral, and emotional development. Remember to be patient, consistent, and compassionate in your efforts, seeking guidance from Islamic scholars and experienced parents when needed. 

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